July 2009

Its toga time once again! You might remember all the drama we experienced during last year’s party - or maybe you blocked it out & it’ll come back later in a therapy session. I’m pleased to say that Toga Fest 2009 went off perfectly & a super swell time was had by all. What a difference a year & a change of players can make! One of the most notable changes this year was a new face at the table. That face belongs to Lori. This was her first “official” game. She got right into the spirit of the evening – putting panties on her head & sharing her vodka w/ Phyllis. What’s that? Bet you can’t take a shot from the bottle without having your lips touch it? Spanky thought they said take the shot without hands (oops). Good thing alcohol kills germs! Marge was the only one who captured photographic evidence of Phyllis’ unknown talent (bottle chugging). However, it was an action shot & didn’t turn out fit to print here on the Blog. I’m pretty sure that image will be burned into your memories for a long time to come anyway!

Phyllis hung up the official toga banner again this year. Debi didn’t car pool w/ Patt & got a bit lost when she pulled up. She went to the house next door! She went to knock on the door, but noticed a sign w/ someone else’s last name on it. This saved her from some embarrassment. Patt said, “You didn’t see the giant banner on the front porch?” Not until she left the neighbor’s house! I’m also pleased to announce that Peg found her way to Phyllis’ house this time without having to be rescued or flagged in by her fellow Pokeno sisters. Everyone was there by 5:30 at the latest. This allowed some of us to enjoy some time in the pool & to chow down on crabs, salads & other goodies before we started playing. We played a cover all & took a break. While we were outside enjoying the summer breeze (makes me feel fine), Peg, Lori & Marge were relaxing/napping in the living room. Patt brought glow bracelets for everyone. We were wearing them in the tent in the dark. When you talk w/ your hands & have glow bracelets on, it’s kinda trippy! This turned into a “tent rave”. We were all waving our arms around having a good time. It’s amazing how easily amused we are!!!

Cosmo had goodies for everyone! She bought gold mugs & personalized them w/ foxy stickers complete w/ our pledge names. Unfortunately, Lori doesn’t have a pledge name yet. Phyllis said she needs some time to get to know Lori better. One thing’s for sure, she’s giving Debi (aka “Juggs”) a run for her money. Can we make Lori “Juggs Part Deux” or maybe “Revenge of the Juggs”? Kate also made delicious Lemontinis to put in our cups. Everyone thought these drinks were most refreshing. We all had some while we lounged in the pool before we started the game. Phyllis hand-crafted wine charms for us. We each chose one to put on our mug straw. There was even a seahorse for Peg! At the end of the night, Lori gave us all bags w/ chocolate covered pretzels & Oreo cookies as a “thank you” for letting her join our special group. Spanky passed out goodie bags too. Inside the bag was a bunch of home-made soaps, bath salt, fizzies & even a “menu” on how to use what product! Not only did she craft the goodies, but she did up the bags & tissue paper w/ our Greek letters.

PANTY RAID

At last year’s toga party, Phyllis had a hazing ritual for all of us where we swore our allegiance to the Sisterhood of Foxy Bitches. This year, Phyllis planned a “panty raid”. She had a pair of panties for each of us (licorice, giant bloomers, bedazzled thongs, candy & edible varieties). Whenever someone hit the Center pot, they got to choose whose panties they were gonna raid. At the end of the night, Phyllis had a special gift for the winner. I had top secret pre-party info about this game & spotted the pair that I wanted (candy). I turned into “Snatchy McGrabs Alot” & grabbed ‘em right up! Everyone else was jealous of my panties & they were taken away right quick. The candy panties were quite popular & went around the table. Eventually I got them back. I’m pretty sure that everyone (besides Cosmo) had them at one point or another. The licorice panties were taken by Marge at the beginning of the night. Later on, Patt took them – but got freaked out (they oozed around in their package) & tried to return them to Marge & pick again. Just like in real life, there are no refunds or returns on undergarments. Kate tried to tell Patt to put them in her snack drawer…or should you keep them in the fridge?

Peg was dubbed “The Panty Queen” by Lori. When she got her 5th pair (off of Lori’s head) – she said, “Ooh! They’re hot!” At the end of the night, it was a 3-way tie between me, Patt & Peg. We had 2 pairs each. We drew cards to choose the winner & “The Panty Queen” won! It was a bag w/ lavender Yankee candle & some other stuff that I didn’t write down, so hopefully you remember the rest.

GETTIN’ LEI’D @ THE TIKI BAR

Again we will have our end of summer luau at Kate’s house. Be there to get lei’d on SATURDAY, AUGUST 15TH @ 6:00. If you need directions, please let me know. Kate will be mixing drinks & I’ll be making pupu balls again. Not sure what else is on the menu just yet, but I’ll be sending you an update as the party gets closer. Kate is also hopeful that her hot tub will be up & running for the party. If you’re interested, bring your bathing suit as skinny dipping is NOT allowed!

MYSTERY BOX

Patt was responsible for the July Mystery. She had a bit of help from Bob A (special thanks to you too sir). She managed to keep the same box, paper & bow from the last Mystery. Plus, she added a decorative touch of wreath leaves on top. I still can’t believe that paper has been going around since our St. Patty’s party! Marge was the winner this time around. The box was chock full of summer fun goodies. Giant sunglasses, a head wreath (for the toga party), flip flops, Ocean Moods CD, sun block (very important!), vanilla incense coil, mini 1st aid kit & a friend banner.

SOMETHING TO PONDER…

I’m sure you’ve all heard tales of Debi’s beach house in Delaware. If not, ask her & she’ll tell you all about it. Anyway…Debi was nice enough to offer up the use of her beach house for a special Pokeno sleepover. If you’re interested, we can make this our official September game house. We can play a few rounds; have a few drinks, maybe even drive into Ocean City, MD for dinner/lunch/etc. This trip will absolutely call for carpooling. I just want y’all to think about it, we can discuss it further during our allotted “business” time in the August game.

DONATIONS NEEDED!

Lori volunteers for her church. Part of her volunteer work includes running a church thrift store kind of thing. Like all good charities, they need donations. So, if you have anything laying around your house (except furniture) that you’d like to get rid of, please bring your items to Pokeno for Lori & she’ll take it for her church. I can’t guarantee that this good deed will get you into heaven - but it’s worth a shot. Worst case scenario, you’ll free up some space in your closet/drawers/basement/attic.

RANDOM FUNNY

The age old question – Just how do you keep men from staring at your boobs? Lori brought this up. Geez, I wonder why men are so distracted while talking to her. Is it her personality (not that it’s not great)? Nah, it’s probably her giant chest pillows! Anyway…Lori says the way to get men to talk to your face instead of your chest is to stare/talk @ their package. If that still doesn’t work, go grab a magnifying glass or tape measure & start to further investigate the package site.

SUMMER BEAUTY TRICKS

Its summertime & that means you’ve probably been outdoors in the sun lately. You probably forgot to apply the sunscreen once or twice too. If you’ve had too much fun in the sun & find yourself a little red, try this home-made recipe for a Sunburn Mist to cool off!

2 fluid ounces of distilled water
9 drops of lavender
2 drops of peppermint
1 drop of spearmint

Mix together & mist lightly over your sun-burned skin. A cool shower & some aloe would help too…

If you’ve been swimming in a pool this summer, or your hair is feeling a bit dry, try this treatment to keep hair happy and healthy.

1 egg
1 eggshell's worth of olive oil
1 quarter of a peeled cucumber

Blend the egg, olive oil and peeled cucumber. Spread evenly through your hair, leave on for 10 minutes, and then thoroughly rinse. If you don’t rinse well, you’re probably gonna stink!

And that will wrap up another month of fun & frivolity. I have to say that the last few months have been nothing but good times (hooray)! Let’s keep up the good work ladies! See y’all next time & may the best bitch win!